Miss Luna

Has it been years or weeks, days.....just hours? Time seems to have been fooling with me. Spinning me around and round till my eyes have lost their focus point. How long has it been...? Don't be afraid. Face your troubles with your head held high and a smile upon your face. Keep on taking steps, one at the time.. It doesn't matter if sometimes you have to return to the point where you started your journey, the only thing that matters is that you don't give up. It may seem hard at times, but little by little......one step at the time... you'll go forward. Trust your friends. Sure they have their own troubles, but no one should be carrying their stones just by themselves, it's a long way after all. Share. Finding new sides inside you. you may be surprised, astonished even scared. We change all the time. As we grow older our experience of life grows with us. It changes us one way or another. Lost. Worry not. The answer hardly shows itself when being pursued. Wait, be...

When you close your eyes do you miss me trying to sleep at night tossing and turning, me on your mind Because baby I do. Sweety are you lonesome tonight feeling this lovepain in your heart Because baby I do

Darkness rising all around when you feel locked up inside lost in the ocean of people not there Black rain washes your purity away so you can mask yourself from the future Search your soul from inside heart may bleed but it'll stop beating once ripped out At first eye's won't see all the cruelty then nothing to live for.. Do you have anything..anything at all to keep you here? Nothing to stop you from taking all the pills from the bottle How trapped to you feel? How lonely are you with yourself Why can't they see Why can't they ask You are so happy outside inside greatest mess ever

Look at me I am here for you I came through mist and storm Through darkness and cold I came for you Take my hand Let's ride together to the red sunset

His dark eyes staring me behind a veil of innocence long have I tried to keep them away but cannot anymore he's too adorable. Smile for me just a little glance me behind your brown hair you make me smile with your innocent sweetness. He's number on my phone I call just to close before the first beep , again and again. Come get me with your white two- seater for a nightly ride grab me hold me in your arms and bend to kiss me 3.3.2009 for Hanazawa and Makino

Is it too late to stop can I forget you ever lived inside my heart? If I give up now how long will this sadness occupy my emotions? Having learned not to wait I call you only to chat with your answering machine do you know how stupid you make me? I'm done with you not being here nor there you try to play but I have called your bluff what shall be your next move? 6.8.2010

I noticed yesterday how stupid I have been wavering the lines of impossibilities seeing nothing without letting go. It all feels so torturing how have I made myself suffer for creations of my own mind. Reading my life backwards I'm where I was 5 years ago crawling back and forth Now would be the time to hurry forward Yesterday I went through purgatory dancing lust for love robe pulling forth and back and I knew I have to stop chase away my anxiety and see as I should have seen a long time ago 2009

Mood: wicked Listening to: Nightmare [ Naito-mea ] People have a way to suprise you when you least excpect them to. This is what I have experienced during these days. You can find sides you never knew existed and have long conversations about things you imagined no one would understand. Escape from the reality you know to the fantasies inside your head. that's the best advice someone has given me for ages. If you cannot do anything to change things youre facing then just mentally fly away. What can you do when you know someone very dear to you will not live a year? Eveytime you see that person...you just have to smile and tell that everything is going to be fine. Everytime you assure she will get to go home soon. But most importantly you smile at the hospital and cry after you get home. Take a bottle of a good wine and quietly enjoy it while watching the skies above. You're not weak if you can admit to yourself that you cannot make it on your own. You're brave when you ask...

Blue rythm knocking at my window I see your reflection when I look through it into the darkness of the night I can't stop thinking about your face my darling, I don't wanna let you go. When Im sitting home alone, drinking coffee and writing I find myself frozen, staring outside of the window thinking the last day... How I sat on your lap laughing with you the tone of your voice took my mind to a place where I want to stay forever Oh, why did everything have to go so wrong I'm so alone waiting for you to call - but you don't Never tought this would happen, I fell in love with you Walking endlessly shadowed by black night I can't get a grip out of anything I coudn't figure out the true you -Too quiet- I was unable to open my soul to you -Too different- We were too far from eachother - Lost- We didn't understand Hoping I would get caught in the rain No one could see my tears No one could hear me wishing that you'd come and hold me and once again I could ...

I stand corrected when ever I see you my pain vanishes My worries are long gone and everything melts And yet, I have to say goodbye never see your kind face again, light blue eyes, perfect lips slinder long legs, black leather jacket long hair, beautiful thin fingers sliding on guitar strings This perfection I have to leave behind and say ~ with a smile on my face ~ This is the last time we'll see. When I hug you I forget where we are it's just you and me whole world spinning round round things vanish only your face looks so kindly at me How I long to touch you slide my fingers through your hair My perfection My passion My lust My hope My dream Yet I'm ready because I have to be. Ready to say goodbye. I can only hope your face ~ in my mind ~ will always look at me with kindness

Listening to: SS501 - Love Ya , U-Kiss - Binggeul Binggeul , Super Junior - Bonamana , Mblaq -Y , B2st - Shock , F.Cuz -No one , C.N Blue - Tattoo , Super Junior -Victory Korea Mood: Creative See the stars above you by night, did you know only the brightest stars shine by day? This was of course from Korean drama series You're Beautiful. From the first episode I was in love with the characters and the actors. Beautiful music and some good and sweet acting by all three A.N JELL guys and Go Mi Nam. Good work! But when you think about it the brightest stars are only visible by day. Each of us have our own stars that make us carry on with pride and admiration. Maybe, mother, sister, friends, celebrities. Someones that make us thank God we are alive here and now. Thanks to You're Beautiful and all members of Super Junior I have been more creative lately. Drawing, singing and writing lyrics & poems. When you see something thats has been made with passion, pride and devotion you ...

Listening to: Olavi Uusivirta - Tuu mun vaimoksein Mood: sad but hopeful Cups of coffee: 4 26th day my grandmother was taken to hospital due to a bad heart condition. It had only been a month since she came back home from the hospital and now her fears came true and she had to go back once more. And I haven't been able to go see her because I have quite a bad cough. She's too fragile... She has tiny green eyes and short silver grey hair. This morning I received the worst kind of wake up call. My dad had been taken to hospital due to a bad heart condition. My dad has never been sick. He never complains about anything and now I was watching him in brown hospital clothing, listening to his hoarse voice and trying not to cry. He has the bluest eyes and darkest, curliest hair. This evening all my most precious people gathered together and we all sat at my mother's tiny kitchen drinking coffee, each of us more tired than the other one. Each of us desperately needing sleep. Two of...

I've been running running away for so long I don't recognize my reflection in a mirror I look and look but can't see the similarities this shell of human surviving from day to another I'm watching her from the mirror But I can't see~ she is me. And then I realize, slowly as days have passed me by it was me, who got trapped inside~ Still waiting the day to come when the shell of mine switches places with me returning to be my reflection once more.

Headache, knocking from inside heart full of unsolved matters eyes wet from all the shed tears: Cannot escape feelings, hide from pain run away from the person in mirror. I am the result of my actions creation of thoughts the vain Ikaros.

Mood: Amused ( By Charlaine Harris's Club Dead ) Listening to: Hallelujah ( By Justin Timberlake, Leonard Cohen) I thought my next post would be something about white lies or dreams. My lack of desire to start writing just took me always somewhere else when it was a good time to start. And right now I have no intention at all to write about either of them.. Two days ago my niece had her spring festival and that was her last at elementary school. There were a lot of songs performed mostly by the first graders and the leaving sixth greaders. One of those songs were Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen. It seemed like an act of fate. That's one of my and my sister's favorite songs. She loves when I sing it to her time to time and it is also the song I sung on my audition. This has made me think alot about fate or do things happen just by accident. I have found through out the passed years that every bad and good thing has had some meaning later on in my life. Let it be the years of...

Ocean within people never ever look twice they can't see inside nor outside. Ghosts of past, present, future memories, not quite accurate realize shall I ever which is mine. Can they identify my shell my empty shell crowded with motionless words. People think they know so much when they know nothing and the oddest thing of all : we're all hiding behind masks unable to understand others are wearing them too .

Give me your wings rip your freedom for me watch how my eyes turn red. Feel my isolation step into my circle of emotions with your wornout shoes. Let me inhale smoke so that smell will stuck with you forever. Endow me your wings from the feathers I shall make a quill stick it through my heart and let the black blood flow. Maybe then I'll get this all to sound right on the paper. Remember, even the history has been written with blood

+ Dedicated to my three lovely boys: Kitti, Kaidoh and Katzuya + Day one. act 1 Rain has been knocking my window for few days now. How I would love to go dance in the rain with you my love, once again. Laugh with my eyes closed with my whole heart. For weeks I have been listening to Super Girl and Bonamana. They lift up my spirit and while the stereos in my sister's car are saying "Boom Boom", I feel like I could be forgotten in those dark city lights. Tonite we shall go for a ride again, I feel so free, so full of joy... Spinnig spinning, the whole word is spinning......

Catch me if you can I shall run far away to the land of fairytales and superstition, beyond the graveyards and tombstones. Run faster try to catch your breath for I shall not walk anymore. Fly to the moon and never back so I can watch you from the starry nightsky The faster you try the sooner I shall vanish